Confidence Changes Everything

While very well-intentioned, the modern approach to confidence usually relies too much upon sheltering children from any kind of hardship, and, an overemphasis on mantras.

The problem with the modern approach is that even if it does work, eventually, the child will be exposed to the real world. Then the confidence shatters. Because it didn’t have a strong foundation of evidence in the first place.

We follow the classical approach at Legacy 22:

Encouragement > Attempt > Failure > Improvement > Success > Evidence > Confidence.

Somewhat tragically, the proper approach to durable confidence is actually the opposite of the modern approach: children need to embrace mistakes so that they know what they’re capable of overcoming.

At Legacy, the newer, younger, and less experienced the student, the more tempered the training and challenges are in class.

The higher students rise in rank, the harder we push them. And we watch them become more and more resilient as a result.

We teach our students to embrace failure & mistakes like a baby learning to walk: undaunted and with a smile on your face. When everyone knows that failure is important, it doesn’t shatter the children’s morale. This is how the instructors are trained to talk about failure.

The main evidence of ability that students receive at Legacy 22, their martial arts belts, must be earned.

We use an exact grading & point system that promotes them once they’ve actually earned it.

Most schools just hand them out like candy. Or the opposite: “You get it when you do better. 👍”

Which can be unnecessarily demoralizing. We have clear standards that get tougher with each new belt.

Don’t let anyone fool you. Building lasting confidence does take time. Typically months not weeks. And, frankly, things sometimes get worse before they get better.

Anyone suggesting otherwise is probably (exclusively) trying to sell you something.

No other kind of confidence comes close: there's a very special kind of belief you get in yourself when you know you have options if people try to attack you.